this is bothering me. I can't sleep because I'm thinking of shit I don't even know what it is and that clearly is something you need to sorta dig into. it's unfamiliar it's weird and it's annoying because I want to get it straight.

gonna write a blogpost about it. Too tired now, work tomorrow gonna put some keywords down so I remember this and hopefully put it together somehow.

plain, grey, likgiltig, __unfamiliar mindset__ ver strange, stuffed yet "empty" but not in a black hurting way in a brainy way, happy, cloud, ill, solid, self-worth/valueinanotherperson,even perfect-not appealing even if it is more appealing than anything else - doesn't bother me - should it? sick for not wanting?
what matters, what doesn't, yellow, smokeycloud, procrastinating,stress tired,sleep..

i think im having/getting a fever